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10 Reasons to Ditch The Dildo and Support Your Local Farmer

We all know cucumbers are great in salads, relaxing for the eyes, and refreshing in our water, but, did you know the cucumber has a wild side that is waiting to be explored? Long before the dildo was ever invented, the trusty cucumber was used to freshen, cleans and pleasure the pussy. Here are 10 reasons why we think you should ditch your dildo and why your local farmer might become your best friend!

Artwork by Albert Escoda exclusively for Hegre.com.

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1. SEXUAL SELF-CARE:

Cucumbers are used to sooth and freshen your eyes, but did you know that cucumbers could be used to soothe and freshen your vagina? Since ancient times, women have used cucumbers to clean and freshen the vagina as they are both antimicrobial and leave a fresh, clean scent behind.
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2. HYGIENE:

Dildos are dirty. You threw it under the bed, put it in that sticky drawer and now, in the heat of passion, you reach for it - covered in dirt, lint and hair! Why risk dildo infection when you have the likes of Mr. Clean Cucumber to occupy your feminine region. With cucumbers, you never have to worry about it being unclean. Each time before use, you peel it and rest easy with that clean, farm fresh goodness into your pretty little pussy.
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3. SIZE:

Your dildo cannot change size, but the handy cucumber comes in all shapes and sizes. Depending on your mood, you can choose your perfect size from Armenian cucumbers, English Cucumbers, Garden Cucumbers and the list goes on… Plus, you can peel the cucumber to any size you want and get its full benefits – cool, calm, and climaxing.
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4. SEXPLOITATION:

Feel good in more way than one. Not only will using a cucumber bring you to a cool and refreshing climax, but you can feel good about lessening the exploitation of child labor in industry factories. Who knew replacing your dildo would make such a difference in the world!
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5. SUPPORT LOCAL FARMER:

Our local farmers need all the support they can get. When you cleanse and pleasure yourself with the handy cucumber, not only are you saving yourself from bacteria and STDs, you will be saving your local farmer as well. Out of all the industries, farmers have probably felt the impact of the economy the most, yet they still feed you, and now they’re bringing you to quiver in your sheets. It’s almost your duty to help them out – ditch the dildo and use a cucumber!
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6. THE CUCUMBER IS AN APHRODISIAC:

The Smell and Taste Treatment Research Foundation reports that the scent of a cucumber stimulates arousal in women! Plus, from our video, you can clearly see how turned on a woman can get with this handy friend.
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7. NEVER BE EMBARRASSED AGAIN:

How many times have your friends, relatives, or even your dog found your bedside friend? With a cucumber, you never have to worry about anyone finding your dildo again! Cucumbers “hide in plain sight” - sitting in your refrigerator, looking cool. Next time you have friends over, you’ll have your own little secret to smile about when they ask how you got your cucumbers to taste so good!
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8. CUCUMBERS ARE ALWAYS DOUBLE-SIDED:

It seems that Nature intended cucumbers for some friendly fun! Rounded tips on both ends double the fun when you invite a friend! See demonstration here.
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9. CUCUMBERS HELP ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION:

Cucumbers are known for helping with sexual stamina - they help men last longer and are dubbed by some as the organic “Viagra.” Plus, when your man sees you play with your cucumber, his juices will be flowing! He will enjoy watching you pleasure yourself with this wholesome tool and when you are done, he may be interested in a little snack. You can also get adventurous and let him eat that Persian cucumber out of your perfect pussy.
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10. REDUCE, REUSE, RECYCLE:

Why add to more burden on the world’s trash with all those plastic dildos going into landfills and oceans! The cucumber is all natural, biodegradable, and leaves no trace. You can feel good about playing your part to save the environment by ditching your dildo today and reaching for the environmentally responsible cucumber!

So, the next time you’re at the grocery store, or in the market for a new bedside buddy, think of your local farmer, save yourself and the planet… and purchase a cucumber!

Comments

User-default-avatar
Amazingly FRESH
My friend shares with me that cucumbers make her feel amazingly fresh inside. Just like the spas that use cucumber slices to refresh and hydrate your eye lids so cucumbers do for her pussy!
User-default-avatar
New Garden
Looks to me like I will be planting a new garden, cant wait to grow my own and put the greens to good use....... and share them with my friend.
C7556948790999e8414f-avatar-image-100x
FUN!
I can not say this is useful for me, ALBERT! Awesome art! sad that i can be easily replaced by a veggie ;P
User-default-avatar
im in love with the cucumber!!
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